Saturday, April 16, 2011

D-Day

One Year Down.....

One year ago today I received the news that my spinal fluid was positive and that the lesions on my Spinal cord reacted to the dye - which meant, a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis. At that point, there were so many questions, so many things to think about, and so much fear.

I have to say, a year out now, I have a little more hope, a little more knowledge and a whole lot of gratitude that I'm a year into all of this and for the most part, am perfectly healthy and happy. I'm not sure why MS affects people so differently, one from another. You'd think it would come and do it's damage, and everyone would be attacked the same way. But, some of us have it in our brains - some of us don't. Some of us have it in our spines - some of us don't. Some don't have any lesions anywhere noticeable to machines or lab work - but have more symptoms than anyone else might have. That's what makes it a very complex disease that can have massive affects on some, and very little on others.

I have been told that because of the extremely high number of O-Bands I have in my spinal fluid, and the amount of lesions on my spinal cord in such a small area, that life should be very different for me right now, than it is.

I can't help but thank my Heavenly Father for blessing me and my family for the past year. I have had some struggles, I have been numb, and have had to miss out on some things because of this, but I also recognize that not once, has MS stopped me from moving or being a Mom for the last 365 days. To me, that is a huge blessing. I know that the possibility of me feeling this well through my whole life is very slim, but for now.....I am so grateful for the health I have had since the diagnosis was made.

My outlook on this is a little better right now. I do think it is because I haven't really been very focused on MS the last 5-6 months. I noticed when I thought about it constantly, or worried, I was worse off than just living life, staying positive, and putting the time spent on those thoughts towards something else.

I have been so grateful for the people I have been able to reconnect with over the last year while going through this. Anna and Jenny, you are huge examples to me and I'm so glad we've had each other to support and relate to.

It has been so neat to get emails from others who have happened to stumble upon this little blog and ask questions or Dr. advice, or just to offer support.

Yes, a year out.....Life is good. Life is great.
I only pray it might stay that way for as long as possible.